Have a baby? Here’s some advice on work, family and life from the book “How to Survive Your Baby’s First Year” (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $12.95), straight from people who’ve done it.
“It’s very hard to go from working fulltime to staying home all day. A spouse needs to be supportive and help out with diapers and baths and other household chores. Mine doesn’t.”
—M., Edgewater, Md., parent to two boys, 4 and 3 months
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“Work together. Raising a child, especially during those first years, should be a team effort. Gone are the days when the mother took on all the responsibilities of child rearing. It’s hard work, with many challenges and unbelievable rewards, all of which should be shared by both parents.”
—Laura Kronen, New York City, mother of one girl, 15 months
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“When I get home, I pretty much give all my attention to the kids because I don’t get to see them all day. The other stuff you think is important — work around the house — can wait. It’s not as important when you put it in perspective with how fleeting those moments with your kids are.”
—Ken Beckering, Syracuse, New York, father of a 5-year-old son and 2-year-old daughter
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“When selecting a daycare provider, drop in unexpectedly to see what the place is really like. Look for a facility that is clean and where the children are happy. Watch how the caregivers interact with the children. Ask lots of questions. Don’t worry about asking something that will offend them — the treatment of your child is more important. Find out the beliefs of the caregivers, how they discipline, their teaching styles and how they feel about issues that are important to you. If you have any doubts, it probably isn’t the place to take your most precious treasure.”
—Stacey Hatfield, Anahuac, Texas, mother of a 4-year-old daughter and one on the way
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“Go to any lengths necessary to have someone you know watch your children. When we needed a person to care for our children, we went to the wife of the deacon who married us even though she lives some distance away. For us, the security and welfare of our kids was the number one priority.”
—Rick Barbero, Gaithersburg, Md., father of a 12-year-old daughter and 5-year-old son
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© 2005, Hundreds of Heads Books, Inc.