Here's some advice on introducing your parents to your partner's parents meet from the book "How to Survive Your In-laws" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've done it.
“When we got engaged, my husband’s parents kept driving by my parents’ house. I don’t know what they thought they’d see; there’s really not that much activity at my parents’ home. I guess parents have to get comfortable with the new family they are joining.”
—Shira, Toronto
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“Stay away from religion and politics. Everybody’s favorite topic is his or her own life. Just hope and pray that whoever is not talking will cooperate enough to nod politely while the others are speaking. If anyone falls asleep, all bets are off.”
—Andrea Weigand, Woodworth, Ohio, years with in-laws: 15
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“Pick something like a barbecue or a holiday to introduce your families to each other. This is what my husband and I did the first time our parents met each other. It worked out well because everyone was well fed and in a good mood!”
—Julie, Babylon, N.Y.
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“Prepare a few topics for them to talk about. My fiancé and I made a list that covered topics ranging from Major League Baseball teams to Christmas traditions to family summer vacation spots, in case things stumbled at the dinner table.”
—A.R.W., New York City, years with in-laws: 4
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“We had everyone, including grandparents, over for an engagement party. We kept it casual and had a cookout. I was on neutral turf at my fiancée’s house; it wasn’t like one family was entertaining the other. And we started the day by driving into Washington, D.C., for some sightseeing. The trip helped set the right tone because we had things to do; we didn’t just have the families walk in the door and sit down on opposite couches and stare at each other.”
—Joe Jackson, South Riding, Va.
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“The first time my husband’s mother and my mother met, they had a lot in common: They both showed up wearing leopard-print sandals and similar outfits. The sandals definitely broke the ice!”
—Anonymous, Toronto
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© 2007, Hundreds of Heads Books, Inc.