Getting divorced? Here's some advice on taking solace in movies, television, songs and the Internet from the book "You Can Keep the Damn China!: And 824 Other Great Tips on Dealing with Divorce" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've done it.
“There was one person who really helped me see the light. She was the only person who truly felt the same way that I did, and still do. Although she is a fictional character, I believe that she is based on a true soul. Charlotte York (Kristen Davis’s character on ‘Sex and the City’) still believes in true love: Her incessant optimism and love affair with love gave me insight and hope.”
—Stacey Samuels, Chicago, married 2 years, divorced 2 years
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“’Something’s Gotta Give’ is a great movie after or during your divorce because it helps you see that love is possible again. Neither character ever thought they’d fall in love again. They are older — so it’s not a romantic comedy with young people falling in love for the first time. It’s also great for showing that you can have a good relationship with your ex, since Diane Keaton’s character does.”
—Alexis, Knoxville, Tenn., married 5 years, divorced 2 years
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“The movie version of ‘The World According to Garp’ has a big divorce scene in it. In the movie, he discovered his wife was having an affair, and it accurately represented a lot of the emotions, especially his sense of outrage. Also, I watched ‘American Beauty’ while I was going through my divorce. It represented the gamut of emotions I felt — the woman having an affair and Kevin Spacey’s character rediscovering freedom, I related to that very strongly.”
—Evan, Atlanta, married 1 year, divorced 5 years
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“My online divorce-support group got me through the hardest time of my life. I also met a male friend in that support group who was so sweet to me that I realized that this is how it should always have been. I realized what I was missing in my own marriage and that I could possibly love and be loved again.”
—Jennifer West, Greenville, Mo., married 12 years, divorced 1 year
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“What music helped me through the hard times? Believe it or not, it was bubblegum pop music: ’N Sync, Backstreet Boys. I was working out three hours a day, trying to regain the figure I had when I was a teenager, and the teenage music really helped.”
—Anonymous, Kent, Wash., married 8 years, divorced 5 years
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“I listened to Tracy Chapman’s first album over and over again. I don’t know what it has to do with divorce, but it made me feel good.”
—Elizabeth, Salisbury, N.C., married 1 year, divorced, remarried 13 years
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© 2006, Hundreds of Heads Books, Inc.