Getting married? Here's some advice from "How to Survive Your Marriage" (Hundreds of Heads, $13.95), straight from people who've done it:
“My husband and I always try to look at the big picture and the long term. Dirty socks on the floor every night can be annoying, but in the relative scope of things, love and companionship, common dreams, and shared values are what matter most.”
—Cathy, New York City, married 10 years
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“She hates it when I use the last of the toilet paper and don’t replace the roll. But I notice that she doesn’t use the whole roll. She leaves just a little bit left so that I’m the one who has to change it.”
—Greg Jantz, Ponca City, Okla., married 7 years
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“Don’t ever keep count. Phrases like, ‘I’ve done the dishes three nights in a row, now it’s your turn’ or ‘The last seven times we’ve gone out to eat, you’ve chosen the restaurant’ have no place in a healthy marriage.”
—Anthony Manuel, Kinder, La., married 14 years
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“In the beginning, sit down and make a list of all the chores that need to be done, then divide them equally. DON’T just assume the woman will be doing everything. Marriage is a partnership and the work should be divided equally. My husband takes care of the yard and house maintenance, the grocery shopping and the bill paying, because those are the things he is good at. I do everything else. This system has worked well for us. We still use it to this day.”
—Cheri Hurd, Littleton, Colo., married 32 years
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“Take turns with the chores. Don’t just divide up the stuff that needs doing around the house and then constantly do the same stuff over and over.That gets incredibly monotonous. One week it’s your turn to do the dishes or take out the garbage, and the next week you do the laundry and load the dishwasher. Variety is the spice of life.
—Bob Schultz, Hopewell, Pa., married 3 years
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Hundreds of Heads Books’ survival guides offer the wisdom of the masses by assembling the experiences and advice of hundreds of people who have gone through life’s biggest challenges and have insight to share. Visit www.hundredsofheads.com to share your advice or get more information.
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© 2005, Hundreds of Heads Books, Inc.