It's a common point of contention between teens and parents: when to come home, and what happens if you don't make it on time.
Raising a teen? Here's some advice on enforcing a curfew from the book "How to Survive Your Teenager" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've done it:
“We never made the conscious to not give our kids a curfew. They were basically good, happy kids, and they just always seemed to come home when they were ready. It always worked out fine. Of course, we don’t know what kind of weird stuff they were doing when we weren’t looking."
—Jack Morris, Waltham, Mass., father to a son, 42, and 41-year-old and 36-year-old daughters
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"All the same rules that applied to our son also applied to our daughter. Especially the curfew. My husband initially wanted to make the curfew earlier for our daughter because 'she’s a girl.' But I insisted that all the kids get treated the same. Equality begins at home!"
—Paget Perrault, Melbourne, Australia, mother to a son, 35, and daughter, 30
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"Curfews really need to be adjusted on a yearly basis. You can’t expect your children to be in at the same time when they are in ninth grade as you do when they are seniors. As long as they obey the curfew, extending it slightly each year will show them the increasing confidence and trust that you have in them and it will make them work even harder to be on time."
—Paula Grubbs Renfrew, Pa., mother to a daughter, 17, and son, 15
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"We’ve always had the rule: Be home or call by midnight. If he calls because they’re watching a movie at someone’s house or going out for coffee, fine, but just let us know. He’s usually home by midnight."
—Anonymous, Littleton, Colo., parent to a son, 19, and daughter, 13
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"The beauty of curfews in our area is that they’re a law. The perfect way out of a potentially sticky situation is to abide by whatever the law says on weekends. That way, it’s not you the kids need to get mad at. You’re not the one setting the laws, you’re just enforcing them."
—Robyn Muramoto, Centennial, Colo., mother to a son, 15, and daughter, 13
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"I devised as system to rest better on weekend nights when my kids would be out. I would leave three lights in the house on, and the third one was right next to my bed. The last teenager returning had to turn off that light. Nobody wanted to do it, because I would usually wake up, so it helped them make it home on time."
—Anonymous, Raymore, Missouri, parent to two daughters, 61 and 58
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"When my sons were old enough to drive, I started to impose curfews on them. Of course, they challenged me. Why suddenly did they have curfews? When I explained my true fear — that statistics show the highest concentration of drunk drivers are on the road after midnight — they understood."
—Susie Walton, San Diego, Calif., mother to sons ages 28, 26, 24 and 22
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© 2008, Hundreds of Heads Books, Inc.