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Slamming the door
Does it really help to take your teen's door off its hinges to keep them from slamming it? Or does that add to their general resentment toward you?
Thursday, October 25, 2007
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Name:
aburrido
Gender:
Male
Age:
46
Living In:
miami
Solutions like that are very bad solutions it will solve nothing it is essential to “dig” deeper to find the source of the problem
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
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Name:
hbond
Gender:
Female
Age:
45
Living In:
dallas
RE: Slamming the door
actually, it is something to think about. i might depending upon the situation. I think it would be kind of funny to do it once, take some of the edge off the anger. However, I would probably remove it just for affect, to open the door (pun intended) for discussion about what is going on - I see the door off the hinges about privacy too - and I know teens hate to lose their privacy.
Monday, January 14, 2008
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Name:
Imale
Gender:
Female
Age:
46
Living In:
London
RE: Slamming the door
I think it will absolutely create more resentment and anger. You need to build trust with your child which means that you have faith in him/her and they have faith in you. Taking off the door is letting them know how much you still think they are a screw up and how much control you crave over them. This will never solve anything.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
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Name:
lcalvacca
Gender:
Female
Age:
54
Living In:
Seaford
RE: Slamming the door
I can see getting to the point of considering this idea. When I first read it, I thought, hmmmm, interesting...I would think of this as a very last resort, with qualifications. Although I don't imagine that I would need to do this, if the door slamming was unrelenting, I might take the door off for one day, or a few hours for the shock value and, as the person above said, "open the door" to dialog. I see that as different than keeping it off for weeks or days or an extended period of time.
I have read that other parents have done this and had great success. The question is, was there other negative behavior that replaced it? Was this after all else failed? Was the source of anger dealt with? Every kid is different and so is every situation, so it's hard to say whether this is cruel unusal or counterprodutive. I could imagine this as a potentially constructive, last-resort, short-term tool in certain circumstances. Luckily, I have not had to put my theory to the test.
Friday, February 01, 2008
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Name:
CasualCounsel
Gender:
Female
Age:
20
RE: Slamming the door
In a teen's mind when they see the gap where their door should have been, they take it as a "unworthy and untrusty kid" which doesn't really give then a chance to see the point you were trying to make... Instead, you can take a step down from that but keep that idea by, simply removing the DOORKNOB instead of they DOOR. So that its not to dramatic and it can be a pain for the kid having to stick their finger in the hole and tinker with it to get themselves back in. My mother did it to me, and i eventually got use to it
Wednesday, May 14, 2008